On a clear spring day, my mother and I hiked an unmarked spur trail to Subway Cave, in Boynton Canyon, near Sedona, Ariz. As we scrambled up a cliff to the cave’s opening, we heard a little boy ask his father, “Do you think moons could be spaceships? We’re always finding more of them.” I turned to my mom, who looked at me with wide eyes. “That kid gets it,” she said, impressed.
I didn’t need to ask what she meant. An hour earlier, we had meditated in the shadow of a rock formation called Kachina Woman, a sacred Hopi site and the supposed location of a vortex, a place where energy flows into or out of the earth. These and other attractions draw millions of visitors to Sedona each year. There, my mother had talked about how these areas aren’t just about the transfer of energy. They are also points of contact where the mother ship will beam the enlightened up to an interplanetary dimension.
Image
She said that if we were to time it just right, they — as in our otherworldly spirit guides — would come for her. Sitting in the cool dirt, I felt my breath catch in my throat. Swirling centers of energy I could handle, but actual celestial portals? All I could think to say was, “Can you not leave me yet?”
A few years ago, my mother’s regimen of yoga and meditation morphed into more mystical pursuits. These included learning about mediumship, the practice of fostering communication between spirits and living beings, and becoming a practitioner of past-life regression, a form of hypnotherapy that purports to connect people to their previous lives so that they may better understand their current one.
I’ve always had a practical outlook on mindfulness, more concerned with its productive benefits, such as better focus or sleep, than a search for greater meaning. But I tried to remain open at first, asking about her chat groups, visiting her at a retreat and agreeing to her offer to guide me on a regression, which was unsuccessful. It soon became hard to hide my concerns, though. My questioning resulted in a disconnect — one in which she felt judged for her beliefs and I felt excluded from her inner world.
We are having trouble retrieving the article content.
Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.
Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.
Thank you for your patience while we verify access.
Already a subscriber? Log in.
Want all of The Times? Subscribe.x1 gaming